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Ok, you suck at guitar. There I said it. You’ve been posing in front of your mirror with your guitar more than you have been playing the damn thing. Well guess what? You are in luck buddy; I’m here to help you. The purpose of these lessons is to let you achieve your full potential on guitar and get you laid. Well no, my intention is not to get you laid, but learning guitar probably won’t hurt your odds.
I am going to write a series of comprehensive lessons that will cover the most rudimentary techniques of guitar to some of the most advanced. It’s not going to be an easy trek, but stick with it and you will soon reap the rewards.
First off, you need to think about what you want to accomplish. What’s your goal? Do you want to know how to strum some chords around the campfire, or have complete mastery of this instrument to the capacity that you can express emotion with sound? Pick a goal and strive to achieve it. One goal is no better than the other.
Second, don’t be an ass about playing guitar. Have respect for others and don’t flaunt your skills in people’s faces to bring them down (or make yourself feel better). Have respect for the instrument, yourself, and others. When playing with someone else, don’t spend the whole time soloing while they are left bored, playing the same rhythm over and over for hours. And remember that just because someone knows how to play an A Diminished 7th arpeggios at 667 bpm, doesn’t make them a good guitarist. Trust me. Technical proficiency is no substitute for inspiration and imagination.
Third, don’t be afraid to learn how to play. I knew so many guys that wouldn’t learn theory or chords because they wanted to be ‘untainted’ by outside influence. That is utter nonsense. Learning chords, scales, finger exercises, and other techniques should liberate you to create the sounds that you are hearing in your head (unlike the medication you’re on that silences the voices that tell you to stab things… weirdo).
Side Note:
However, if you find theory boring it makes you want to quit playing guitar, then hell yea, don’t learn it!
Fourth, keep guitar playing interesting for yourself. Don’t let anything keep you from playing guitar. When you are starting out, it can be very difficult to stay focused on the guitar because everything is so damn difficult. Figure out what excites about playing and do it. If strumming a couple chords is your thing, awesome. If you like to play non-musical scale exercises, so be it. Getcha pull, and stay inspired so one day you can inspire others.
Until next time, axe slingers…
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